Snack Review: Sweet Street Desserts

I was a tough customer for these. First of all, I bake from scratch. Second of all, I live in a big city with access to plenty of bakeries, and don’t really need to order cake in the mail.

Third of all: They make a big selling point of the fact that these are the same desserts that you get in restaurants, and now you can get them at home! Note that what this means is that they are the desserts you get in restaurants that don’t make their own desserts, but instead buy them frozen. Since I am highly suspicious of any restaurant that doesn’t make its desserts in-house, I am extremely unimpressed with this selling point.

I’m just putting my cards on the table here, so you know where I’m coming from, to be fair to these products. But I figured, hey, maybe I have been going to the wrong chain restaurants. And I never met a baked good that I wouldn’t try at least once, so I wasn’t going to turn my nose up at these when they arrived at my door.

I got two kinds to sample, Toffee Crunch Blondie, and the Summerberry Stack. My assistant at the Snackerrific Silver Spring outpost, who is not that big a fan of dessert, insisted on defrosting and trying the blondies immediately, they looked so good to him. They definitely looked pretty. Remember, these are made for the restaurant trade, so the way they look on the dessert tray or in the glossy color pictures in the dessert menu is critical. If the goal of these products was to have us look at them and think OOO, WANT NOW, it worked.

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Snack Review: Kellogg’s Special K Protein Shakes - Milk Chocolate

I consider myself a connoisseur of all things protein, whether they are shakes, bars, or supplements. For the last five years, I personally blended my own protein shakes using a variety of proteins (whey, casein, soy) and liquids (milk, almond milk, water).

Through trial and error, I like to think I know how a good protein shake should taste and what should (or should not) be in it. So when I was offered a chance to review Special K’s latest line of protein shakes, I thought my background as a proteinoholic would serve me well.

Though there are a few flavors on the market, I was sent their milk chocolate flavor. Glancing over the nutritional breakdown on the back, I first noticed this thing wasn’t for me. 190 calories for 10 grams of protein? To put that into perspective, a gram of protein is 4 calories, so that means this thing has 40 calories derived from protein, or almost only 20 percent. Is that bad? Well, that depends.
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Snack Review: Little Debbie Muffins

I imagined it old school style.

Richard Dawson kissin’ up on the ladies, the giant Family Feud board behind him as he repeats the question: “Name something special you might eat for breakfast.” He winks at the Milwaukee housewife as she bites her lip, concentrating as if her life depended on uttering the most popular response to this inane survey question. She’s really kickin’ those wheels into high gear up there. At last she blurts out: “MUFFINS!”

She’s bouncing and vibrating all over. She’s either ready to burst or smother Dawson in her ample midwestern bosom. Suffice to say, she’s excited. Dawson gives her a wink and a pat on the hand, wiggling his pinky ring with a flourish.

“Show me MUUUFFFINNNNS!”

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Snack Review: Chocolate Chip Cookie Showdown

The recent issue of Consumer Reports rates chocolate chip cookies. I was - intrigued? offended? dubious? - to find that two brands outranked my favorite Chips Ahoy.

I mean, “favorite” isn’t even the word. In my mind they are the standard, the traditional, THE American cookie. What’s more, they are outranked in these ratings by Keebler.

Here’s the truth, people: As far as I know I’ve NEVER eaten a Keebler cookie. I’ve certainly never chosen to buy them myself. I don’t want cookies baked by creepy little elves in a dirty forest. And yet, Keebler were ranked “very good” and Chips Ahoy only “good.”

Well, this was a challenge. And - what if they were actually better? So of course I had to try them.

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Snack Review: Somebody’s Mother’s Chocolate Sauce

You see, that was before I met Somebody’s Mother - her sauce, specifically.

Holy Willy Wonka. Where to begin.

A spoonful straight out of the jar at room temperature tasted like pudding, fudge, and pie filling all at once - a top-shelf, gourmet quality, rich and velvety confection. Not surprising since the ingredients are simple and fresh, with no preservatives: heavy cream, sugar, butter, unsweetened chocolate. The texture was akin to very thick cake frosting, but without the nerve-jarring artificial sweeteners.

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