Snack Review: Snack Patrol Cheese Jerky

Some words just naturally seem to fit with “jerky.” You know, like “beef.” Or perhaps “turkey.” Heck, even “soy” doesn’t seem too far-fetched. Even vegetarians get cravings for salty bits of high-protein chewing gum now and again.

On the other hand, there are some things most sane people never want to hear directly before “jerky.” “Sofa,” for instance… and I can’t imagine many people would be too anxious to try Cigar Jerky. Then again, most people wouldn’t touch a product called “Cheese Jerky” with a ten-foot pole, either. After all, cheese is basically rotten milk. How would someone go about drying that out and turning it into jerky?

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Snack Review: Calorie Mate

They still haven’t come up with that meal in a pill that they promised we’d have in the future. Not that I would want all my meals to be replaced by a pill, but sometimes, when there isn’t time to make a nice event out of a meal, wouldn’t it be a useful thing?

Instead, we have a whole product category of power and energy and granola bars. The problem is, these look too much like candy bars, and have similar flavors to candy bars, so you’re set up to expect a candy bar… and are always disappointed.

I’ve tried a lot of them and have never found one that I’m interested in eating repeatedly. So I was curious to see if the Japanese had come up with something better.

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Snack Review: Medora Snacks

With the harried and hectic lifestyle demanded by the modern world, just finding time to eat feed yourself can be a luxury. Sitting down to eat with the family? That’s a pipe dream for most of us. Still, those of us blessed-slashed-cursed with others who depend upon us for sustenance (kids, husbands, Manorexic boyfriends, etc.) like to know that everyone is properly fed. All too often, that means frequent trips to the drive-through, Chinese takeout, or - when all else fails - bags of chips or cookies.

With all of the recent media attention paid to childhood obesity, it’s only natural for a parent to feel guilty about feeding greasy, preservative-packed snacks to his or her family, and to wish for a healthier alternative that’s just as easy. Enter Rockville, NY-based Medora Snacks. Medora (literal translation = a Mother’s Gift) has a noble mission:

“To bring to the world wholesome, great tasting snacks made from the very best, all-natural ingredients. To be true to our brand values of delivering better-for-you snacks that mothers can feel good about eating and sharing with their family and friends.”

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Snack Review: Wye River Crabbers Crackers

They’re just crackers, you probably think. How could there be drama? But so many aspects of my personal history were at war when I encountered these crackers.

They are crab-shaped cheese crackers, flavored with the traditional kind of herb and spice seasoning mix that is used on crabs in the mid-Atlantic region. The animal nut in me cannot resist an unusual animal-shaped food, even a cookie shaped like maggots. Also, now that I’ve lived temporarily in Maryland for, um, fifteen years, I sometimes feel guilty that I don’t have more local spirit. Wye River is a local company based on that local culinary obsession, crabs. And since the crabs are unfortunately kind of going extinct, I figured the company would need support for products like these that don’t have any actual crab in them.

So I popped these crackers into the cart without any more thought. But when I got home and popped them in my mouth, that was when the battle started: the Italian in me came out.

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Snack Review: The Cheddar-tastic Michael Season’s Taste Test

I’ve got to credit the snacksmiths at Michael Season’s - they’re incredibly generous. I was grateful to the homegrown Illinois company already for sending me some of their Baked Multigrain Chips to review a few weeks ago. Apparently, Michael Season’s was satisfied with my review - I was pleasantly surprised, this morning, to discover a second box of Michael Season’s goodies, larger than the first, waiting at my door.

In eager anticipation, I peeled away the industrial tape and cardboard to find… Cheetos, Michael Season’s style. Not only did the “Natural Gourmet” gift me with its “Ultimate Cheddar Cheese Curls” - oh no. The Midwestern proponent of “Feel Good Snacking” also threw in its Cheddar Cheese Puffs in both Original and White Cheddar. To top this all off, they decided it would be a great idea to also include the healthier “baked” incarnations of the Cheese Curls and Cheddar Puffs. I laid the selection across my kitchen counter, feeling a bit daunted - being a lone reviewer, I had my work cut out for me!

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