I Drink Your MILKSHAKE!
Milkshakes have always been an important part of the complete snacker’s repertoire, and with the success of this year’s There Will Be Blood and the popularity of the quirky and brilliantly creepy “milkshake” scene (is there any doubt that Daniel Day-Lewis is a genius?), there seems to be a slight surge in popularity for the frosty and deeply satisfying drink.
You can also find t-shirts at the “Ultimate T-Shirt Search Engine” Teenormous featuring the milkshake-drinking catchphrase.
With cooler weather upon us, or at least gaining on us, I took one last look at this summertime beverage and compared a few of the choices on the market. Here are the astounding results.
Chic-fil-A: Oldest daughter ordered a vanilla milkshake and I ordered a lemonade. I had to stifle a laugh when I asked for a sip, and after having taken said sip I proudly proclaimed, “I drink your MILKSHAKE! I drink it up!” She rolled her eyes. Whatever, Dad. I embarrass her often these days, especially since she’s in junior high school now.
The shake had a vibrant texture, requiring some initial effort on my part to get it through the straw, but once the flow started it was smooth sailing. Flavor was creamy and natural.
Wendy’s: One afternoon at work I asked if any of my comrades in the snack review lab required a refreshing afternoon milkshake pick-me-up. Hands flew up, currency was exchanged, and ten minutes later I returned with chocolate Frosties from Wendy’s.
Though not a traditional milkshake in my opinion, if you let it sit untouched for 15-20 minutes, you can certainly drink it with a straw, especially a very long strong - from ACROOOOSSSS THE ROOM! Really, Frosties are more of a cross between soft-serve ice cream and a true milkshake. To enjoy them like a milkshake, one must wait, and in the words of Tom Petty, “The waiting is the hardest part.”
Arby’s: The unique Jamocha shake from Arby’s blends chocolate and coffee flavors. This shake, which debuted in 1964, has always been a craving snack for me since the chocolate/coffee combination can be a bit harsh on the back of the throat at the finish. Still, it’s a nice change of pace.
Steak ‘n Shake: We all ordered milkshakes and drank each other’s milkshakes. My wife and I had chocolate. Our oldest had an Orange Freeze, delightfully reminiscent of orange Creamsicles and a far superior version of McDonald’s limited-release Arctic Orange milkshake of yore - I still shudder when I think about those. Youngest daughter had a “side-by-side” of chocolate and banana. Doing my best Daniel Day-Lewis impression I drank her milkshake - I DRANK IT UP! (I know, this is becoming tiresome.) To which she simply replied, “Stop, you have your OWN.”
McDonalds and Burger King: The McDonald’s and Burger King milkshakes have never been at the top of my list, and rightly so - most often they taste as if they contain plastic fillers. Although I don’t claim that they do, they sure taste artificial. Who can forget their seasonal Shamrock Shakes, the minty green thing that just won’t die, forever popping up in select franchises around the country. The best part about those was Uncle O’Grimacey.
Busters Ice Cream: I’m a huge fan of all things strawberry, but not in a milkshake. I do, however, make an exception for Bruster’s Ice Cream shops. Their strawberry shakes are chock-full of tasty fruit chunks small enough to make it up through the straw. Delicious.
My favorite? Although the two are very close, I rate the Steak ‘n Shake milkshakes #1 over Chick-fil-A because they’re consistently top notch and I always leave a Steak ‘n Shake feeling bloated and sleepy - sure signs of a lusciously fat-and-sugar-filled milkshake.
I’m sure you have your own favorites, possibly found only at a lonely diner off the beaten path in your neck of the woods. I’d be interested to hear about them.
Milkshakes. DRINK THEM UP!
6 Comments
Justin on November 4th, 2008
You really need to try a Carl’s Jr. Shake. The real ice cream makes a huge difference.
Technosquid on November 6th, 2008
I was in McDonald’s today and noticed they had their Egg Nog Milkshake, as well as a pumpkin pie. I’ll have to try them while their available.
In Japan, McDonald’s has a white grape (muscat) milkshake. I think I’ll have to try and concoct a homebrew version.
I love There Will Be Blood, but it’s no Magnolia. =P
Jim on November 8th, 2008
Thats my daddy. I’m so proud. Keep on rockin’!!
LOVE, Julia Simpson A.K.A his oldest daughter
jwoolman on April 8th, 2009
Nestle has a really really good strawberry frozen lemonade (12 oz cups/1 serving per 4 oz unless you’re really hungry) in the grocery stores. If you thawed it more, would pass for a milkshake (but no dairy). My freezer is quite cold, but this seems to stay soft enough to spoon out right away. If you’re organized enough to find a clean glass, could make something like this with frozen strawberries and lemonade, supposedly (let’s just say I stock up on the Nestle cups when on sale…). The plain lemonade version from Nestle is too tart for me, although I’ve blended up some frozen fruits and mixed with the frozen lemonade and that works fine.
Since I’m allergic to dairy - I discovered that just about any fruit makes a good “milkshake”. Just freeze pieces for an hour or so (or buy them) and blend with cold water (or ice if you don’t freeze first and your blender can handle it), experiment to get the right consistency. You can add sugar if you must, but I like it straight. Good fruits to try alone or mixed: melon (especially honeydew, great by itself), peaches, nectarines, plums, pineapple, various berries and cherries.
If you like banana - that can be added to anything to give body and texture (also toss in dates). Bananas can be frozen in pieces for such purposes (they don’t last long in the freezer, but you’ll get at least a week out of them; I freeze pieces for a couple of hours then bag them; they’re still good even if they look a little brownish). If you use something milky (dairy or nondairy with ice? or dairy/nondairy ice cream; powdered mixes work such as the Better than Ice Cream mix) or the right fruits, you can always add cocoa powder for a chocolate shake. Cocoa powder should be good with banana and/or pineapple (also try adding cinnamon, with or without the cocoa). Probably would be good with cherries also. I actually slice up unfrozen bananas and eat with lots of cinnamon and sometimes cocoa (when not eating them with the traditional peanut butter…). But frozen bananas do taste better, you can also just cut in half and put sticks in them before freezing and eat like a popsicle. If you’re good at dipping, you can coat them with something but that’s too complex for me (although I had some success with something sold as an ice cream topping that made a chocolate shell on contact with the frozen banana).
Oh, frozen grapes are wonderful! Just freeze on a pan separately and enjoy.
Elise Sain on May 4th, 2011
I’ll definitely be coming back for your site to see more articles when i loved that one..
amy on November 3rd, 2008
where i went to college in davis, california, there is a little place by the highway called murder burger. i know. weird name. i don’t even remember if the food is any good. we used to ride our bikes all the way out there just to get the fresh strawberry milkshakes. they tasted like the freshest strawberries and homemade ice cream you have ever had. i don’t even like strawberry milkshakes, but these really were to die for (the motto of murder burger). the strawberries were grown locally, so they were ultra fresh-like out of your own garden. the best milkshake i have ever tried.
now that i’m living in montana, there are the usual fast food places, but there’s a small chain called frugal’s burgers that makes an excellent huckleberry milkshake when huckleberries are in season. i love when they change the sign to say “we have huckleberry shakes now” when the berries have come in season.
i have to say, i love the old wendy’s frosty. it’s a great standby and we used to dip our french fries in the frosty. sweet salty combo. it’s worth a try.