Snack Review: Wye River Crabbers Crackers

They’re just crackers, you probably think. How could there be drama? But so many aspects of my personal history were at war when I encountered these crackers.

They are crab-shaped cheese crackers, flavored with the traditional kind of herb and spice seasoning mix that is used on crabs in the mid-Atlantic region. The animal nut in me cannot resist an unusual animal-shaped food, even a cookie shaped like maggots. Also, now that I’ve lived temporarily in Maryland for, um, fifteen years, I sometimes feel guilty that I don’t have more local spirit. Wye River is a local company based on that local culinary obsession, crabs. And since the crabs are unfortunately kind of going extinct, I figured the company would need support for products like these that don’t have any actual crab in them.

So I popped these crackers into the cart without any more thought. But when I got home and popped them in my mouth, that was when the battle started: the Italian in me came out.

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Snack Review: The Cheddar-tastic Michael Season’s Taste Test

I’ve got to credit the snacksmiths at Michael Season’s - they’re incredibly generous. I was grateful to the homegrown Illinois company already for sending me some of their Baked Multigrain Chips to review a few weeks ago. Apparently, Michael Season’s was satisfied with my review - I was pleasantly surprised, this morning, to discover a second box of Michael Season’s goodies, larger than the first, waiting at my door.

In eager anticipation, I peeled away the industrial tape and cardboard to find… Cheetos, Michael Season’s style. Not only did the “Natural Gourmet” gift me with its “Ultimate Cheddar Cheese Curls” - oh no. The Midwestern proponent of “Feel Good Snacking” also threw in its Cheddar Cheese Puffs in both Original and White Cheddar. To top this all off, they decided it would be a great idea to also include the healthier “baked” incarnations of the Cheese Curls and Cheddar Puffs. I laid the selection across my kitchen counter, feeling a bit daunted - being a lone reviewer, I had my work cut out for me!

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Snack Review: Cape Cod Buttermilk Ranch Potato Chips

Cape Cod makes the best potato chips on earth. Hey, I’m some person who writes stuff on the Internet - you know it must be true. And potato chips are the best salty snack on earth.

But, for that very reason, I don’t like flavored potato chips, and don’t understand why Cape Cod ever started making them. Why would you want to take the greatest snack on earth, already perfect exactly as it is, and add stuff to it? How can you improve on perfection?

So normally, I would never have tried these. But the other day I found myself eating a sad, boring bag lunch while sitting next to a large box that was half full of tiny bags of these chips. They were free for the taking, and it was a very lame lunch indeed that I was eating. And the bags were so tiny that even if I had to throw away most of the contents of one, well, I would not feel very guilty about not being able to send them to the starving children in whatever country modern parents threaten their offspring with the starving children of.

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Snack Review: Michael Season’s Baked Multigrain Chips

A few weeks ago, the snacking Goddess herself, Caitlin, asked if I’d be interested in reviewing baked multigrain chips. Naturally I accepted. When it comes to crunchy, salty snacks, Sun Chips are at the top of my list. That’s right - when it comes to chips, I’ve always preferred the multigrain variety to the potato- and tortilla-types. Pretty healthy, right?

Well, not really - Sun chips may be a lesser evil among our beloved sinful, salty snacks. But when it comes to being good for you, they have nothing on the Baked Multigrain Chips produced by Michael Season’s. The Addison, IL.-based company’s motto is “Feel-Good Snacking.” This seems to suggest that either you should feel good about eating such wholesome foods, or that the products taste so amazing, they’ll make you “feel good” with every bite. I’m guessing the PR department at Michael Season’s was going for the former interpretation.

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Snack Review: Beer Chips

Beer and food. A tag-team combination enjoyed throughout the world, and the stuff of comedic genius captured on film in such modern day classics as Beerfest. Sure, we have Beer Nuts, beer cheese soup, beer-can chicken, and beer-battered-anything-you-can-fry. But chips?

Finally, an idea whose time has come. Beer + Chips = Beer Chips. So simple. So Zen. Right there in front of us all along and we couldn’t see it.

Available in three flavors, these thick-cut kettle style chips are bold, hearty, obnoxious and fun, just like your hard-drinking college buddy. These chips are your wingman and might even take a bullet for you. (Okay, that was really over the top - it’s just the beer chips talking.)

BEER CHIPS

The company’s signature chip, these resembled standard chips in size and color. The first bite revealed the unique flavor in a high note for the olfactories: a sharp essence of strong pilsner. The flavor receded quickly, replaced with a rather sweet and malty potato taste (ingredients include barley, hops, and yeast, of course).

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